It could have been the storms that blew in that fall, but I’m pretty sure it was the Presidential elections. It was also Edwin Poole and being yanked back to Boston. Crane, Poole & Schmidt, inexplicably, became the vortex of impudence. Contempt wrapped in a smirk. Mockery. Or, not to put too fine a point on it, Alan Shore.

Sure, I invited it. Mock me if you will, I’d say, but don’t mock our troops. The firm at large took it to heart. I still flinch if someone says lesbian. Do I have a sign taped to my forehead that says ‘mock me’? Yeah, that’s the way it was in 2004.



I know that’s how it started, but I can’t say when my code of conduct started to fray. In D.C., I flew with eagles. There were so many loonies at the flagship, I must have assimilated about the same time the Sox euphoria wore off. Now mocking opposing counsel, a young associate, the A.D.A. – it’s just a tool in a lawyers arsenal, used to effect. Truth be told, in the hands of a great practitioner, it’ll give you a tremendous advantage. With others, it just makes you look like a tool.

I’ve come to the conclusion that mockery is a gateway drug, the words that slip you down the slope to actions. The gleam from my sterling reputation is now more like a bad glare through a streaked windshield and I can’t make out the road ahead.

The realization was like a good left jab followed a week later by an unexpected upper cut. It was the Crane divorce. We were all there – a show of force – to protect Denny. Bev’s attorney was seated across the table from us. Eli Granger, the smug, slippery son of a shark. He had the balls to embarrass Denny in his own firm – said his marriage would’ve lasted longer had he not banged that cocktail waitress at his own wedding reception. Said clearly Denny is at fault. And by the time Bev gets what’s hers - who knows. Maybe he’d have his name on the door here.

I wanted to deck that son of a - “Do you smoke it or take it in the arm?”


The following week, I was looking into the amazing eyes of a meth addict. I walked away from her so she could get well – and corrected my own course that day. We can all do better. I can do better.

[Cross posted to Theatrical Muse: "Write about a time you mocked somebody."]